Negotiation Space
The basic guide
Negotiation is how you and your partner agree on what happens before it happens. It’s a conversation, not a contract and not a checklist.
Before anything else
Everyone is equalWhen you negotiate, all parties are equal, whatever their role or experience level.
It’s okay to say noThere should be no pressure to play. A no is a complete answer.
You keep you safeThe only person you can count on to keep you safe is you.
Don’t be shySheets are aids, not a substitute for a frank conversation.
Know your riskMost interactions come with some risk. Think about the level of risk you’re comfortable with.
Decide before you startBest practice is not to renegotiate during play.
The basic guide
What it is
A talk about wants, limits, and ground rules before you play.
- Say what you want
- Say what you don’t want, and what’s a maybe
- Agree on check-ins and how you’ll stop
The basic guide
Before you talk
- Know your yeses, noes, and maybes
- Pick a calm time when nobody is rushed, tired, or already in the mood
- Plan how you’ll stop or pause
The basic guide
Questions to ask
- What would make this a good experience for you?
- Is there anything you’re nervous about?
- Is anything off the table today?
- What do you need from me if things get intense?
- How do you want us to end, and what do you need afterward?
Ready to put it on paper?
The sheets help you write down what you talked about.